call 'em off, Jase!!!

[Neka79]

he liked the look of your ASSSS Marty....& now he knows where u live 2 ........POLICE.....OPEN UP....THEM CHEEKS BOY

hahahah thats piss funny....well said yap...
i think ur on the money.....keep that ass pointing at the ground marty!!

[Yankee]

seriously guys: THANK YOU!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOL LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just what I needed!!! I've totally put this guy behind me, it is funny now.....

But yeah Jase, I did ask him "why?" and i guess he was doing the "be a cunt so i can book him" routine, cuz he just wouldn't "talk" to me at all!

anyhoo... funny that hemi, huh?! damn plastic counter tops at the normanby!

and Chris... you bastard, stop looking at my ass!

but yeah, growing up in the states and seeing how we treat our cops over there (they are GOD, you do EXACTLY as they say... you DON'T try to speak to them... they instill FEAR in our feable mere mortal minds...) I mean, i have nothing but RESPECT for them (aside from the pig jokes after-the-fact).... then i get over here, and i've been in cages with mates who, when pulled over, just laugh and carry on with the cops like PALS?! WTF?? amazing!! and the cops here... well, not wearing proper "covers" (hats) when in public and uniform not 100%... i don't get it... well, different to me anyway....
i am over it btw!!! cheers all!

[aardvark]

well, not wearing proper "covers" (hats) when in public and uniform not 100%... i don't get it...

That's standard. I never wear my stupid f&%ken hat, and I can't keep count of how many times this year the boss has cracked the shits because I haven't been wearing my tie!

I mean, what the fark is up with that?? A tie? Seriously...

[Barrabob]

Apparently the TIE is meant to cover the circumsision scar in most cases, although i have come across all types of coppers.

[jewjew]

I got pulled over 3 years ago on christmas eve just after i had finished work, (was a chef).
The cop said to me "Have you had anything to drink tonight", i looked him in the eyes and said "nah mate, but if you get the first round, i'll grab the next".
At that point he said "blow into the tube sir"

[red_dave]

I got pulled over 3 years ago on christmas eve just after i had finished work, (was a chef).
The cop said to me "Have you had anything to drink tonight", i looked him in the eyes and said "nah mate, but if you get the first round, i'll grab the next".
At that point he said "blow into the tube sir"

Similar story but a lucky escape in the end...

A few blokes from work had organised a night of simulation car racing at the Gabba and on the way we came across an RBT. I thought awesome, I can finally say the line i've been waititng to say for years that the missus wouldn't ever let me...

"Sorry officer... The last thing I blew into got pregnant..."

Neway, they waved me pass much to my disapointment...

2 months later, I was driving back from Toowoomba and noticed the car rego had run out 6 months earlier... Could have gotten very nasty if I had actually been pulled over...

[HemiDuty]

Hahahaha nice one Red Dave. Lucky escape alright.

[mike-s]

how the hell did you miss that dave?

[HemiDuty]

He was dreaming of one day meeting a nice Ping pong ball and settling down...

[aardvark]

Talking of funny stories...

I pulled a 'P" plater up in his car last night, after watching him fish tale it down the road in the wet. I walk up to the window and ask him to:
"Grab what's left of your licence and step out of the vehicle."

He knew what he had been stopped for and was begging me not to give him a fine. He then went on to inform me that he only had one point left on his licence and he had only had his licence for less than 6 months.

He then went on to continue to beg, plead and whine about me not giving him a fine. God I hate that... So, out comes my old favourite:
"You keep talking, I'll keep writing."
That normally shuts them up.

Anyway, I write the fine out, a lousy $93.

"How many points you got left mate?"
"1"
"Bugger hey, this one attracts 3 points."
The lads mouth drops, tears start to well up in his eyes and I say:
"Just kidding, there's no points."

Anyway, he was happy. Less than a 100 bucks, he gets to keep his licence and I suspect he learnt a lesson.

My point? The fun works both ways.

[Yankee]

LOL LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!
that's great..... but i reckon (with his record) he'll be pulled over atleast one more time before 6 mos.??? unless you made a good impression on him?!

good onya Jase!!

[Nanna10r]

This is a classic post guys good stuff.
A. Marty, I thought all you stunters on the North side rode Glory before the cops got up ?.
B. Chris, I hope Marty didnt keep the School uniform Fab sent him for the cops to play dress up with him at the next illegal arms search. We all knows Yanks are naked without a firearm
C. Red Dave, Pongee has a Big Bump on his middle ? WTF ?.
D. Jas onya mate thats a great abuse of Power keep scaring some sence into them please.

I remember being pulled over 3 times in 2 weeks a couple of years back, when i asked why the Officer said something 40% of motorcyclists were unlicenced & they were having a crack down (Bend over Lurpee & touch your toes Pretty Boy ).

Could of been bullshit but you never know.

Stay calm, be polite & most of the time you get what you deserve.

Cheers Brett

[red_dave]

how the hell did you miss that dave?

It was the missuss'ssss car...

[Jonno]

Hahahaha ... Good one Jason, so actually pleading a bit can help. I got done recently when I stupidly took off from an intersection and got pinged with a radar on a patrol car in a back street going the other way, he said he got me at 92 for a second or so but I will do you for 15 over in a 60 zone 3 points and $150 bucks, he reckons I was already pulling over (I admitted it by stopping IMO) when I seen him just before he put his lights on so he gave me the lesser fine and was very genuinely interested in bikes but owned a Hooonda . I had to bite my tongue. So I think I got off rather lightly considering that 30+ over would have got me off the road as I only had 4 points.

[aardvark]

Hahahaha ... Good one Jason, so actually pleading a bit can help.

Nope, not normally....

If you want my honest advice, try this:

1) Get out of your car (don't try this in the U.S. You may get shot. ) and go and wait on the footpath. Wait next to your car and not the passenger side window of the Police car.
2) Don't get your licence out and have it ready for them. It just makes you look like a smart arsed little turd.
3) Don't ask "Is there a problem?", "What's this all about?", "Have you got nothing better to do?"
4) Be polite. Let's face it, if you're going to get a fine, it's probably because you did do something wrong. So, what's the point in trying to ensure you get one? It's all about trying to not get one.
5) Don't repeatedly call the copper "Officer" or "Sir". Such as "I'm sorry officer, I didn't mean to do it officer, please officer." - Bzzzt!! Annoying as crap!
6) Be honest.
7) Don't try and be funny. Let the copper have his moment and laugh at his piss weak jokes.
Try to look sorry.

Normally when a copper stops you, they'll conduct an "Attitude Test". This test starts from the moment you pull to the side of the road and you can fail it from the moment you first open your mouth. Failing the attitude test is a sure fire way of getting a fine.

Now, the above may not necessarily work. If the officer has decided before he gets out of the car that you are going to cop a fine, then stiff. Nothing you can really do about that. The usual bullshit excuses will never work, have heard them all... a million times.

If all else fails, tell them you've just finished work, that you're running a bit late to get home (if it's 2 a.m. tell them you're a night filler or something), that your wife/husband is waiting for you to get home because they have to go to work and they can't go to work until you get home because your 3 year old twins have bronchitis.



As for P-platers, you normally get what you deserve. If you're a P-plater and you don't believe the cops are trying to save lives by stopping you, come for a ride with me and I'll show you numerous places in the metro area where there are flowers on the side of the road, attached to the stobie poles that killed other P-platers. Whilst you're at these sites, maybe you can take a moment to read the messages of grief and sadness left by the families.