My dear old mum has been beating cancer for nearly 20 years. She was first diagnosed with it in her 50's and after a double masectomy and most of her Lymph nodes being removed she survived. Over the past ten years, it has been coming back to bite her. It would come back, she would beat it off with Chemo and Radio therapy and then 6 months later another lot would appear in another part ofthe body. She battled on with each new cancer becoming closer and closer in time until she was in a position where a new lot would appear before he had got rid of the last lot. At 76 she finally cried enough about three months ago and refused anymore Chemo. She was sick of living sick. The Chemo was knocking her around and making life not worth living. Constantly felling sick. So for the last three months we have had her in pretty good spirits and health. But, over that time, the cancer has become even more agressive and she is in palliative care being made comfortable and the family has been called in to say goodbye. Now, it's down to how long that piece of string is.
The current status is nil by mouth, and four hourly morphene, but they do have her on a drip. However, this will most likely be removed as it was put in only to keep her alive until my little brother could make it back from Beijing where he lives; he arrived this afternoon.
Up to this stage I am coping quite well. Mum and I spent all weekend together. Chatting when she was awake and just being there for her when she was asleep. We have said our goodbyes and are at peace with each other. I have stayed strong and not made her feel horrible by falling apart in front of her. I may be different once she goes, but right now I am doing OK.
What I would like to know though, is some insight into what I am up for next. While I know everyone handles things in there own way, I also know that sometimes forwarned is fore armed! So, what hapens from here, what are some of the feelings some of you experienced? What things occured which caught you by surprise and is there any one piece of advice you might offer from hence forth?
. So, why a person like that gets cancer, I will never know?? Now everyone's mum is brilliant, but my mum, well she had an advantage over all the other mums. She was the daughter of my grandfather. My grandfather was an amazing man with a persona that had to be seen to be believed. Freaky calming. Mum inherited this. One of those people who just really got where ever the hell it was someone was coming from! It didn't matter who she was interacting with, or how bizzare one might think the person was, she had an ability to just understand. To get them! Pretty cool sort of mum to have around as you were emerging from boyhood to manhood. I fucked up a lot as a kid. I was a boundary pusher. But, she never lost patience ....or hope! 
I'm more just wanting to see if there are things I should watch out for from here....Like surviving parents reactions and siblings?? Relatives?? Friends??? 
The emotions area is covered well....it's the path that follows I am more interested in. 
