Making my way down a cager decides that he wants to pull over to make a phone call, but instead of pulling over on his side of the road, he decides to perform a U turn in a 2 lane road.
Not only does he decide to do that, he decides to do it only 50m infront of me. Apparantly he didnt see me until his van was blocking my entire lane. He decided to speed up to get out of my way, and i decided to swerve to miss him. Thankfully we both did this otherwise you would be scraping me off the side of his van.
There just wasnt enough room to stop safely, even though we had done the braided brake lines and it was stopping like it was new (thanks Robracer), so as im trying to miss him and not hit oncoming traffic, the left side of my bike hits a rear metal step which he had just put on apparantly.
Completely smashed the stator cover and fairings, thankfully it missed my leg.
As this is happening i am catapulted off my seat and into the air. As im flying, i think to myself, "oh look, im about to hit the van" so i perform a mid air manouver to pivot my body and evade the rear end of the van. Like something out of the matrix, i dodge the van, but now im flying head first towards the ground. Well survival instincs kicked in and i tried to put my hands out, but then thought that to be a bad idea.
By the time all this is going through my head, i have landed head first on the asphalt, and thanks to my mid air manouver, my momentum carried my body over my head and i began a comando roll, only one or two rolls i cant remember. The rolls had stopped and the sliding now began, i could feel the bike above my head sliding merrily with me and i remember thinking "please stop before i do".
Thanksfully it did, and i slid a few extra meters.
When i had done all my sliding, i bounced onto my feet, by this time the guy had gotten out of the car and was screaming out saying "oh my god im sorry im sorry its my fault"
To which my response you "You are F#@$ right its your F#$@% fault you blind mother F#@$er , didnt you see me you F@#$ head" actually this is a toned down version, i have never sworn so much at someone before...boy it felt good!
By pure chance Ali drove by and identified the kuda and pulled over, by the looks of it she was more shaken up than i was, but i managed to calm her down and send for help.
Anyway, the fireies came and quickly threw some saw dust to soak up all the oil and fuel, and as quick as they arrived they left. Shortly after the coppers came and got our stories.
From the little words i could pull together i managed to incriminate myself and one of the coppers wanted to book me on the spot for neg driving. I did say i hit the back of the van, but she didnt understand that it was on an angle and not a rear end collision.
Anyway that explained correctly the cager owned up to the coppers that it was his fault. So i should be getting a call later today with a claim number from the guy.
Wade rocked up with recovery vehicle #1 and he did all the hard work of loading it up while i was being breathalised by the coppers (thanks mate you are a champ!)
In the end, the bike is now getting a quote and im waiting for my doctors appointment. Im fine, no visible bruises, just some minor scruffs to the leg, but nothing to be of concern.
Damage report:
From what i can see the stator cover is gone, the fairings are all damaged except for the sub frame ones, levers are bent, and possible damage to the flywheel .
My gear held up ok, despite having a cheapie Rjays jacket, it has a big scuff on the shouder and back where i slid, Joe Rocket GPX gloves are absolutely fenominal, only damage is dust from the gravel i slid on. Helmet has a massive scuff on it from the landing, so thats gone, pants and boots are ok.
Lessons learnt? Well maybe i should have spotted this earlier, so i will scan further than what i was scanning, thank god for leathers! and maybe some flying lessons are in order.
a big big big thank you to Ali and Wade for taking time out of their day to come get me, you guys are champions!
oh and despite what it looks like, iver had nothing to drink
Fark 
I'm so happy you feel ok, but even happier you're getting checked out just in case.
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