Funny post from ADVrider forum

ducati_paul · Post by **ducati_paul** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 11:14 am

Last night was not my best night.

The day started out just fine. A few meetings. Nice weather outside. Decided to take a few hours off and buy a pair of leather pants to go with my new 990 Super Duke (I figured that if I was ever going to need them, it would be on this bike!)

Found a real nice pair at the local shop. Only problem was that I had my street clothes on and couldn't wear the pants home. I was on the Super Duke and had no place to carry them easily on the bike. I decided to fold them and lay them on top of the gas tank. Rode back to work this way without problem.

Stayed very late at work at a meeting that went on forever and that turned ugly at the end. Happy to get out and looking forward to my ride home. Put the new pants on the tank as I had earlier in the day and started on my way home.

I get all the way across town and am within striking distance of home when I encounter a strong gust of wind that picks the pants up and blows them off the bike onto the busy four lane street that I am riding on. I immediately pull over, park the bike and dash back to try to rescue my new pants.

Standing there, I watch several cars drive over them and then a car passes over them and they get hooked on the rear transaxle and off they go, dragging beneath the car (which is unaware that my pants are there.)

I run back to my bike to make chase only to discover that my new bike fell off the kickstand and is now lying on its side.

I pick it up hurriedly and discover that the clutch lever has broken off at the end and the shifter lever is bent. Still able to ride the bike, so I get on it and take off after the car that is dragging my pants that is now far down the road.

I'm moving at a pretty good clip and catching up to the car but still don't have it in sight. Just as I have almost caught up to it (I think I have it in sight) I come upon a car in front of me that jams on its brakes to stop at a light that has just turned red. I am looking over this car trying to find the car with the pants and don't appreciate how quickly the car in front of my has slowed until its too late.

I jam on the brakes hard, lock the front wheel and slide in a straight line directly into the center of the rear bumper of the car in front of me. I am still vertical. The rear of the bike lifts up into the air 45 degrees and I am just about to accept the fact that I am truly screwed and about to fly off the bike onto the back deck of the car, when the rear of the bike plops itself right back down on the ground with me still on it. Kind of a "hard stoppie".

I take a moment to determine that I am still in one piece and discover that the only damage to me is that my family jewels are a bit sore from their unscheduled meeting with the back of the gas tank. The bike is, remarkably, unscathed except for a broken front plastic fender

While my pants are sailing off into the sunset, I have to pull over and do the information exchange thing with the poor fellow that I rear ended.

That done, I feebly ride down the road a bit hoping against hope that my pants might be lying on the road but have no luck. I then decide that I had better get my butt home as quickly as possible before I do some other harebrained thing and end up killing myself.

All told, the series of misadventures took less than five minutes, but in that time I managed to lose a brand new pair of leather pants ($420), damage the clutch lever, shifter and front fender of the bike (maybe $150), and wreck the rear fender of a car (God Only Knows - I am going to pay for it out of pocket to avoid an insurance claim).

It is truly amazing how quickly you can screw things up when you really set your mind to it.

Moral of the story: Don't let one bad thing lead you into another (...and another.) Keep your head about you and try to maintain your cool. Accept your losses before you compound them into even greater ones. And don't carry bulky items loose on your gas tank.

Post by **Wattie** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 11:51 am

he should've stayed in bed that morning...

Post by **robracer** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:15 pm

fffffark that's the definition of a shocker

OutbreakMonkey · Post by **OutbreakMonkey** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:28 pm

Sounds like the definition of an idiot to me

smek · Post by **smek** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:37 pm

that's a bit harsh. I'd just say he was adventurous.

Post by **robracer** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:37 pm

OutbreakMonkey wrote:Sounds like the definition of an idiot to me

you dont know Paul? do you?

ducati_paul · Post by **ducati_paul** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:44 pm

robracer wrote:
OutbreakMonkey wrote:Sounds like the definition of an idiot to me
you dont know Paul? do you?

Me? wasn't me! I just posted it from another forum!

Post by **robracer** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:46 pm

ducati_paul wrote:
robracer wrote:
OutbreakMonkey wrote:Sounds like the definition of an idiot to me
you dont know Paul? do you?
Me? wasn't me! I just posted it from another forum!

arr the plot thickens.... thought it was your exploits

Stereo · Post by **Stereo** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:16 pm

ROTFL hahaha it might have cost him a thousand bucks.... but that story is GOLD

Glen · Post by **Glen** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:37 pm

ducati_paul wrote:
robracer wrote:
OutbreakMonkey wrote:Sounds like the definition of an idiot to me
you dont know Paul? do you?
Me? wasn't me! I just posted it from another forum!

Yeah yeah we believe you....

"Doctor, this friend of mine went to Thailand and had sex with a lady boy, and well you see this friend of mine now has a rash just under here...Doh"

QLDZX6R · Post by **QLDZX6R** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:48 pm

Stereo wrote:ROTFL hahaha it might have cost him a thousand bucks.... but that story is GOLD

Hey he can afford a new SuperDuke and leather pants,don't think a grand is gonna hurt

Frank · Post by **Frank** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:28 pm

A bit unlucky but it could have been worse.

Post by **robracer** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:09 pm

frl0173 wrote:A bit unlucky but it could have been worse.

What hit by a semi?

Frank · Post by **Frank** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:43 pm

robracer wrote:
frl0173 wrote:A bit unlucky but it could have been worse.
What hit by a semi?

At least he was able to ride the thing home, Ok it cost him a few hundred dollars but he didn't end up in hospital or fliying over the top of the car he ran into.

Gosling1 · Post by **Gosling1** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:11 pm

there are a lot of funny stories on AdvRider..........a lot of wankers on there as well, but the stories, and the pictures, are worth putting up with the wankers.....