STOP THE PRESSES - MOTOR VEHICLE INDUSTRY HITS BACK !!

After news that there was a campaign to lower the speed limit to 30kph in residential and high pedestrian traffic volume areas, the motoring community has put forward its own propsal. Australian Motoring Group with the backing of the RTA, NRMA, RACV and NUMA have put foward a proposal to lower the legal limit of walking, so as to give pedestrians more time to survey their surroundings, and react in a controlled and timely manner to any motorised threat.

Recent studies have shown that in trial locations around NSW that when a lower speed of walking was enforced there were less traffic incidents involving pedestrians and motorised vehicles. The local council of Pharken on the eastern coast lowered the legal walking pace to 30sph (Steps per hour), the flow on effect was that as a pedestrian came near the road, they usually had a fair few minutes to notice any on-coming motorised vehicles, and use their remaining steps, to get the fuck off our roads, and back on the fucking footpath where they belong.

Insurance company Tower Insurance was also pleased with the move saying that as the only people who hit cars were stupid fuckwits walking slowly, thus making smaller dents and cleaning out the gene pool for the rest of us.

In related news, Harold Scruby has admitted to a lifetime of gobbling wang, and being a pillow-biting man-whore - he has also been reported bathing in petrol, so if anyone has seen this man, it is advised to flick matches at him, so that he may die in a fire.

those pharken carns are all wang gobblers!

i can see the new ad campaign now!

"Dont Run! Speed Kills!"

Well actually the latest research shows that if pedestrians don't leave their homes at all they hardly ever get run over, soooooooo why don't we just impose restrictions on the amount of time people are allowed out of the house on foot. Simple really

.....and statisticaqlly speaking the incidence of pedestrians being run over while smeared with Yak fat is zero so as of monday morning a compulsory smearing of all pedestrians with a liberal coating of Yak fat is mandatory

That's gold

hmmm if only it were true.....

walking should be banned....

actually what is the fine for jay-walking?? mustnt be too good, cos today i ran across the road amidst traffic, right in front of a cop car (and abt 50m from a crossing).. didnt even yell abuse at me...bet if i was speeding by 5kph he woulda fined me tho...

LMAO!

Sweeeeet!

Maybe we should have doors that have an common sense test incorporated into the locking mechanism. If you can't pass the test you don't get out the door, not even into the back yard as you may get decapitated by the spinning clothes line on a windy day.

Classic